Several weeks ago in our Wednesday night class at church we read about the call of Isaiah. In chapter 6, God calls Isaiah into service. One of the questions that our leader asked was whether or not God was being unfair or hypocritical for asking Isaiah to do something that was impossible. I answered this question in front of the group with my 2 cents, but more about that in a bit. We also had a reflection exercise that we completed at the end of class. See the photos below.
I wrote from the heart, as I have felt that I am so unclear of WHAT I am supposed to be doing for God's kingdom. Our lives are currently so overloaded with therapies, exercises and interventions to help give our little bear the very best shot to be successful and functional in this world. I don't think that God would have me stop doing these activities and leave my little man to flounder, but I feel inadequate sometimes. I struggle with what more I should be doing outside of these things.
God had an answer for me the next day. He's got a good sense of humor. Really, I actually giggled. Let's revisit that answer to the question in class. Here is a paraphrase of what I said in class....
"God isn't being hypocritical or asking Isaiah to do something that is impossible. He is asking him to be faithful to God, to do what he asks him to do. God doesn't expect Isaiah to fix the people of Israel. He is asking Isaiah to be faithful to God in the journey as God works on the people."Funny....that's what God put on my heart the next day as I re-read Isaiah and my reflection prayer...by using my own words. He isn't calling me to anything specific right now, but to be faithful in everything I do, along this journey. There may be a point that he asks me to drop it all and do a radical mission. Right now, however, my heart is peaceful knowing he is asking me to be faithful to him, his awesome power, his control, his plans for my life and my family. He doesn't expect me to "fix" anything...which is good, because I am lacking! Thank goodness he can make up all I lack. My job is to do my best to reflect him in all I do...at therapy, while doing our exercises at home, while in IEP meetings, when working with patients, when cooking dinner, when interacting with my husband. Be faithful in the journey and answer with a resounding "Here am I."
Dear Heavenly Father,
Thank you for the gift of clarity that you provide us with. Thank you for opening my eyes to your will for me and doing so in the spirit of encouragement. I am so thankful that you are in control and don't put the burden of "fixing" everything on me. I love you and am so blessed by our leaders in their lessons.
Amen.
~*Shelby*~
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